(It was the) Summer to Fall


So summer is pretty much over, and thats cool, change is good. I moved (sort of), some of my friends went back to school, and some of them are still around (sort of). It was probably the best and worst summer of all time (how Charles Dickens of me). I feel more lost and totally alone than I ever have in my life, and I think a few of my friends can identify with that feeling of falling from grace. I think thats the important part, even when things are totally screwed up that you learn from it, things have to get worse before they get better, right?

Out of a combination of boredem and the hope of figuring something out, I started re reading Marilyn Manson's autobiography, which is quite possibly my favorite book of all time, if you have a strong stomach, I highly recommend it. It's good to learn about something you're afraid of.

So, lots of change is underway. The leaves will change and the air will get cold. But the Fall is just so pretty.

Theory on Karma



For those of you that know me, most of you are aware my job isn't the most glamorous, it can be at times, messy, so to speak. It has however allowed me to develop a theory about karma, and life. I think in your younger years, to make it later on, you are required to "wipe ass", and all that entails. Then, after that stage is (finally) over, you move on to kissing ass, which is equally as obnoxious, just not AS degrading as the previous. After kissing ass and climbing up whatever ladder you've chosen, you eventually get to kick ass. Don't get me wrong, I really do enjoy my job, which is more than alot of people can say. However, if you are among the masses who despise their job, take it with a grain of salt, the more ass you wipe now, the better off you'll be later on, right?


I so seriously need a cat.

The Ballad Of the Confused College Student


Due to recent events, it has occured to me that everything I thought I knew/believed in, is either wrong or a total lie (which are the same thing, I'm aware). I realize a great deal of my peers often feel this way - I guess it's the American College Experience. You don't want to go to school for whatever it is you're going for, you have a couple major freak outs at inappropriate times, drink too much, push everyone away, maybe experience a minor league homosexual experience (Note: If you were wondering, no), yadda, yadda, yadda. You question just about everything you do, get really stressed, lose sleep, and rant in your blog. And I'm sure this isn't limited to college students, either. So after the freak outs and the late nights, what do we do with it? I guess you could start smoking crack and just say the hell with everything, but that tends to get very expensive and even more unproductive. For those of us who advocate for progress, maybe instead of asking ourselves what we're doing here when we wake up, ask yourself what means something to you, or what makes you happy. I'm no motivational speaker, and I don't live in a van down by the river, but if we don't try to stay positive, what else do we have?